It was a real barn-burner down in the land of the Phoenicians in Arizona. The Don turned it on and up in an unadulterated, no holds barred, tour de force that his people went ga-ga for. He made them laugh, he made them angry, he made them feel special and then he whined and whined and whined about how maligned, maligned, and maligned he was.
He was the “Truth” and all those casting aspersions, members of his own party and especially the media, were liars, except Fox and Friends. And of course, there was a special shout out for Hannity the great promoter of The Don’s insanity. (Forgive me please as I just couldn’t resist the rhyme!)
Speaking of “Truth” The Washington Post released the new bean count of The Don’s lies since his presidency: the tally comes in around 1,000 or about 5 times a day. Rumor has it that Amazon is working on publishing its first in house release entitled: “The Book of Lies: The 6th Testament”, which they are marketing to the Don’s cherished Evangelicals as a companion piece to the bible that sits on their night stands.
The Don led his flock in a chorus of “build the wall,” threatening to shut down the government if the Democrats didn’t do his bidding. The only thing missing was “lock her up,” though there was a few hecklers escorted out of the arena that were chanting “lock him up.” Oh, have times changed.
And didn’t you love the presence of Ben Carson or as I like to call him ‘Zen Ben’, with his Botox smile, looking like he was on life support. Zen Ben, the African American prop, testament to The Don’s embrace of the African American community-proof that he doesn’t have a racist bone in his body. As a Jew, I was really disappointed that there wasn’t a rabbi up there. Unfair! A half dead black man and no rabbi? Time to fire the event planners.
Pundits were also incredulous that The Don didn’t mention the naval officers lost at sea who were aboard the USS John McCain. How does a president not acknowledge this? Well, when you are as infantile and vengeful as The Don, and furious at John McCain for bucking your healthcare victory, those naval officers are dissed by mere association to the McCain brand.
However, you could bet that if the soldiers were on the USS Trump, we would have heard plenty about them: how amazing they were, how The USS Trump was “the most beautiful and bigly ship ever” and by the way, “Did you know that I live in a beautiful apartment that is even more beautiful than the ship?”
But the heart of his speech was his whining about how misunderstood his comments about Charlottesville were. He decided to read from the statement he had made when he had condemned Neo-Nazis, White Supremacists and the K.K.K. Somehow, he left out his comment about there being violence and bad actors on “on both sides”, which was the source of all the blow back and outrage, as it suggested a moral equivalency between White Supremacists and those protesting against racism and Anti-Semitism.
I wonder if his piece of paper just had those words redacted or he just looked at them, smirked to himself and just skipped them. His inability to address this made everything he said a lark, a wink to the very people he was supposed to be criticizing. This wink caused the banished Bannon to have such a sustained hard-on that he developed Priapism and had to be rushed to the emergency room in order to bring him down to size.
The way he went off script stating “ I hit ‘em with Neo-Nazis, I hit them with everything. I got the white Supremacists, the Neo-Nazis. I got them all in there. Let’s see. (Looking down at his paper) K.K.K., we have the K.K.K.” The way he riffed on this reminded me of someone in the supermarket speaking to their spouse and saying yeah, I got the mayonnaise, got the ketchup, oh let me check, got the peanut butter, too. Check. Check Check.
Then came the Joe Arpaio moment. Would The Don pardon the Racist Sheriff Joe, who was convicted in July for disregarding a federal judge’s court order to stop detaining people based solely on the suspicion they were in the country illegally as his actions were a violation of these individuals’ constitutional rights?
Good ole Joe Arpaio, of Maricopa County, the poster child for The Don’s cruel immigration policy, who brazenly practiced racial profiling.
Good ole Sheriff, the law and order man, who made a daily feast of terrorizing brown skinned people, rounding them up and holding them in what he referred to as “concentration camps”. For over two decades, he operated “Tent City,” where detainees were kept in brutal conditions, including temperatures soaring well above 100 degrees Farenheit.
Good ole Joe who shackled women giving birth and whose prison is currently undergoing multiple sex crime investigations.
Good ole Joe who forced detainees to work on chain gangs and to wear pink undergarments as a form of humiliation.
Like another reality show event, Trump held the audience in suspense. Would he or wouldn’t he pardon him. Chants of Pardon Joe reverberated throughout the crowd: Then he whipped up the crowd further with “Was Sheriff Joe convicted for doing his job?” The Don was silent for a few seconds playing with the crowds emotions, with that self-serving signature smug smile and then stated: “I think he is going to be just fine, Ok? But I won’t do it tonight because I don’t want to create any controversy.”
I actually spit up a cherry I was eating when I heard that. A new motto for The Don: The man who eschews controversy, who actually is stirring up controversy while claiming he does not want to.
Stating that Sheriff Joe would “be just fine,” was such a shameless wink to the very people he was purportedly denouncing, that after he said it a putrid stench of The Don’s bullshit wafted through the arena.
After all, the Don and Sheriff Joe had a great love affair going; both were partners in crime in promoting the birther thing. Both built their brand by exploiting racial resentments of white America. Like The Don, he was misunderstood and maligned; his treatment was so unfair. “If they can go after me they can go after anyone in this country.” What has this country come to Sheriff Joe?
The Don left Phoenix with Sherrif Joe’s conviction still standing, but we knew it was just a matter of time until he would pardon him, as racists, law breakers and those who disregard the constitution need to stick together. Guess Crime does pay. In fact, it can get all the way to the White House!
So it was when The Don was getting his daily dosage of Fox News, searching for his greatness to be reflected back to him, but only seeing coverage of the devastating hurricane about to descend on Texas, with loss of life and billions of dollars in destruction, that the frustration and disappointment started gnawing at him like a tooth needing a root canal. How was it possible that Fox News could be featuring someone named Harvey over him? He started grumbling at the TV and said: “This can not stand.” What to do? Desperate to steal the thunder from the hurricane, he took out his phone and did what he does best; create controversy and attention for himself, by Tweeting: “I am pleased to inform you that I have just granted a full pardon to 85 year old American patriot Joe Arpaio. He kept Arizona safe!”
By pardoning Sheriff Joe at that moment, The Don created his own Harvey to remind us that he is keeping America safe.
P.S. Thanks to The Don and Joe for emboldening their followers to strut their stuff. Below are photos from a State Fair in an unnamed Mid-western State.
Never read this before but truly enjoyed it! You speak truth with humor!😇