Dressing Them Down

Babies crying separated from their parents. The government enacting a dark version of Abbott and Costello’s “Whose on First,” where total confusion reigns and no one knows who supposed to be doing what. A judges’ response to a prosecutor over the missing children says it all: “They take your kids and you get nothing? Not even a slip of paper? I can’t understand this… If someone at the jail takes your wallet, they give you a receipt.” That goes for dry cleaning, coat checks and pretty much any transaction when someone leaves something and expects it back, but children, meh?

The cruelty and incompetence of The Don’s administration blows the mind. So with that as a back- drop, let’s talk fashion.

For those of you who don’t remember, during the humanitarian crisis of Katrina, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was in New York on vacation taking in a Broadway show and spending thousands of dollars shopping at a 5^th Ave Ferragamo shoe store, So while people were dying (over 1800 did), Condi was sprucing up her Italian shoe collection. How about we call that two-tone deaf!

If you recall, when Melania and The Don descended from Air Force One to review the ruins of hurricane Harvey, Melania was wearing stiletto heels. Can’t you just see her readying herself for the journey, looking through her shoe collection (can you imagine the value of that collection-move over Imelda Marcus) and saying: “I think I’ll go with these waterproof stilettos just in case I have to walk in any puddles.”

Then there is Ivanka, the defender of the family and women posting a picture of her and her child dressed in matching PJ’s (well, not exactly matching but…) showing us how important the bond between a parent and a child is while children are being separated from their parents. Ivanka who wrote in her book, “Women Who Work,” “Remember that nothing is forever, except that you’re a parent.” (However, if you are a parent seeking asylum, well, I guess it might not be forever!) Tone deaf? That’s getting away too easy. How about despicable? Yeah, that’s better.

Ivanka did address the issue by asking: “Daddy, what are we doing about this?” Isn’t it so sweet that she still calls him daddy? But at the end of the day Ivanka backed up the president’s fake narrative that it was Congress’s fault. When The Don finally ended the pitiless policy that he imposed, she congratulated him on Twitter for being a hero and urged Congress to “find a lasting solution.”

Thank you @POTUS for taking critical action ending family separation at our border. Congress must now act + find a lasting solution that is consistent with our shared values;the same values that so many come here seeking as they endeavor to create a better life for their families

3:28 PM – Jun 20, 2018

Oh daddy, you saved us again from those mean Democrats in congress who created this. What would those poor children do without you? That’s like thanking your parent or husband for not beating you and telling them that they are so kind.

So let’s return to Melania and give her a chance to redeem herself. People were saying the First Lady needed to go down to Texas, as she would have access to the facilities where some of the children were being kept and it would be a signal of compassion from the White House. So how did she do? The shoes were definitely better, but the jacket was a bit problematic and had this on the back of it:

“I Really Don’t Care. Do U?”

Turns out that Melania was wearing a $39 jacket from Zara. When does Melania wear anything that costs $39? I guess when someone told her about this she just thought it was the coolest thing ever and just had to have it. After all, how gauche would it be to wear some expensive designer coat to visit poor immigrant children escaping horrendous circumstances in their countries?

But what about the message on the back of the jacket, Melania; what are we to make of that? What could she have been thinking? Here are some possible thoughts:

1. I thought it was better than putting a giant middle finger on the back of it.
2. Oh my, I didn’t even know it was there. All I could think about was what a great deal it was.
3. None of those poor children could read English, so I thought it was funny to be saying how concerned I was while kind of crossing my fingers behind my back-you know, pretending I really cared!
4. I was just making an existential statement about how awful things are and how shell-shocked I am after being devalued by my husband for all these years. (Please help me!)
5. POTUS made me wear it, as he wanted the world to see that even though he signed an executive order to stop separating children from their parents, he really didn’t care about any of them.
6. I did try to reason with him and asked him how it would feel if Barron were separated from him and he said: “Who’s Barron?”

The fact that The Don was boxed in to signing an executive order disallowing the separation of children from their parents infuriated him. No one tells The Don what to do. Insiders in the administration are saying he is grousing about his decision. Immediately after he did it, he flew off to a rally in Duluth, Minnesota and doubled down on his immigration policies. On twitter he decried:

“We cannot allow our Country to be overrun by illegal immigrants as the Democrats tell their phony stories of sadness and grief.”

He commented that “his people love” his ranting and raving on this issue.

And what about our two first ladies, Melania and Ivanka? What will they do about using their positions to reunite the children? They could become the faces of a task force intent on make this happen. They could bring some dignity and morality to the white House. But sadly, they will do nothing, because they really don’t care. Who has time for that when there is a sale on Ferragamo shoes!