Tale of Two Viruses: Part 31

While the virus rages and the economy falters, the Senate continues to abdicate its responsibility to the Americans hit hardest by thwarting a financial relief package.

It has bigger fish to fry. Screw the dead, the sick, the destitute, the hungry, the homeless, the frightened American people, as there is a Supreme Court Justice to appoint.

Rumor has it that even before The Notorious RBG’s passed, the self-proclaimed “Grim Reaper,” Mitch McConnell, felt a warm glow come over him and called his shameless buddy Lindsey, the chair of the Senate Judicial Committee, to tell him to get ready as it would be “any minute.”

Lindsey looked at McConnell with a shit-eating grin and said: “How the hell do you know that?” McConnell smirked and chortled, his jowls quivering like a child getting its first taste of ice cream: “I ain’t called the ‘Grim Reaper’ for nothing. And that darling ACB (Amy Coney Barrett) is going to erase RBG; it will be like she never existed.”

Lindsey: “Ha, brilliant Mr. GR. Can I call you GR, since we are getting all “initially” here?  I find myself humming that oldie but goldie from the Jackson 5 “ABC, it’s easy as 123.”

McConnell: Of course, you can. They can call me the Notorious GR. But LG, it’s ACB, not ABC.

Lindsey: Got it Gr, ACB, it’s easy as 1, 2, 3.

McConnell: There you go LG. And look at that little swivel in those hips when you sing it!

Lindsey: Maybe we can send out a joint press release: “The Notorious GR and LG present ABC, oops I mean ACB.”

McConnell: “As the president says: Love, love, love it!

Lindsey: Back to ACB replacing RBG. It’s kind of like DJT erasing the black guy.

McConnell: You mean BHO?

Lindsey: Yeah, that guy. And with ACB we will finally get to fully erase BHO, by having the courts undo Obamacare, or as it is called: the ACA.

McConnell: That will be something to POP open the champagne for.

Lindsey: I can use some bubbly as there this black guy, JH, in South Carolina who is on my tail and I need a bump from the ACB thing. By the way, do we have anything in the hopper to replace the ACA.

McConnell: Umm, think not, but we will think of something. And after we get rid of the AC.A we move on to erase RvsW.

Lindsey: Clever G.R. This initials thing is kind of fun. Makes you think on your feet. And boy, will ACB and Bret, oops, I mean BK and Clarence, gee, messed up again, I mean CT and the others disappear the rights of women to choose. I mean this woman is so anti-abortion that she adopted babies from Haiti, one of those shithole countries.

McConnell: Really, that is something.  I hear they have hand maidens in People of Praise or as it is referred to as POP. This guy Adrian Reimers, a longtime Notre Dame university professor who was one of the group’s original founders, but left the group, said POP believes:

“Women are by nature manipulative. This is one of the effects of Original Sin on them. The wise husband will factor this into his relationship with his wife, recognizing that much of what she does is insincere.”

Lindsey: Wow, take that Me Too. It’s about time we had some pushback on those cancel culture people. And listen to this GR in 2006, she gave a commencement speech at Notre Dame law school in which she told the grads, “Always keep in mind that your legal career is but a means to an end, and…that end is building the kingdom of God.”

McConnell: The Evangelicals are going wild. What irony LG: An amoral president, who, hush, hush, is pro-choice and who is more likely to have read Mein Kampf than the bible, appointing the most pious of people.

Lindsey: Don’t you just love hypocrisy, GR.

McConnell: Whatever it takes to win, LG. Whatever it takes.

Lindsey: I’ll drink to that.

Can it get any more exhausting and demoralizing? Is there a light at the end of this darkness?

There is an election in 6 weeks and Biden’s lead is remained consistent at around 8%. Biden’s beating The Don in every group except men between 45-60.

Even older people, who The Don won by 7% are favoring Biden. Perhaps they woke-up when they realized that The Don’s mishandling of the pandemic sends them the message that he doesn’t care if they live or die. In Florida, a state The Don must win to have a chance at the presidency, people over 65 favor Biden. When people were asked to rank the reasons for their change of heart, the handling of the pandemic was number one, but not being able to take advantage of “Early Bird Specials” was a close second. One responder said: I don’t know if there is a heaven, but I doubt they have “Early Bird Specials,” and frankly, I need to be around when things get back to normal to make up for all the ones I have missed.”

That should bring some hope and relief, right?

But wait, did I hear that right? Did The Don tell us he might not leave the White House? Here is The Don:

“Well, we’ll have to see what happens. You know that. I’ve been complaining very strongly about the ballots. And the ballots are a disaster.”

When asked if he would commit to a peaceful transfer of power, The Don replied:“Get rid of the ballots, and you’ll have a very — you’ll have a very peaceful — there won’t be a transfer, frankly, there’ll be a continuation.”

A continuation?

I hope none of you were surprised. The greatest rigger of them all thinks the election is rigged? Did anyone think that The Don would just walk away from the financial spoils of his kleptocracy, where he gets to live out delusional fantasies of absolute power without a fight?

Let’s go back to GR and LG on this.

McConnell: And one more thing about ACB. I’m sure DTJ made sure if the election gets all tangled up because of this mail-in ballot fraud, that she would be on his side.

Lindsey: I can see DJT sitting her down, looking her over, wondering if there was anyway he could “move on her,” and acting the way he did with Comey when he asked him to back off the Flynn thing.

McConnell: LG, you dirty old man, thinking that DJT was trying to put a move on ACB. But absolutely, I can hear him saying: “I am going to nominate you for the Supreme Court. You will be the youngest ever. Certainly, the most attractive. But you need to do two things for me. First, when the election gets to the court, you will side with me; second, you will vote to erase the ACA. Then you can have a field day with the abortion thing. Deal?

Lindsey: And she says: “I swear on the bible.”

McConnell: Don’t you just love hypocrisy.

Lindsey: Just love, love, love it!

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